Facebook Types

My blog yesterday got me thinking about the various types that are registered with Facebook and how the way people utilise it is generally a reflection of their personalities. There are those that post elusive statuses in an attempt to illicit dozens of comments from 'friends'. For example, a post might go something like, "Louise Humphries: is worried...", prompting other Facebook users to reply with comments such as, "Oh, are you alright honey?", "Worried about what? Hugs", or "I'm here for you if you need me". Louise Humphries is probably only worried about whether she should order a Chinese or pizza for dinner but she has accomplished what she set out to do, for this is a classic attention-seeking Facebook action. Taken to the extreme, there are those who may have real problems but that really should keep those problems private and not announce them on Facebook. If you have just discovered you have a serious and life-long illness, confide in your true friends and family in person or on the phone, not to all five hundred of your Facebook 'friends'. The same goes for those who find it perfectly normal to post updates on their marital problems, sex lives and bowel movements (yes, unfortunately, I have seen someone do that). One word: don’t.

Then you have the time-wasters/people who genuinely have no life. They are the ones who post dozens of status updates a day. "Ben Daniels: had cornflakes for breakfast", "Ben Daniels: is bored at work", "Ben Daniels: can't wait till 5pm", "Ben Daniels: is thinking about what to have for tea", "Ben Daniels: doesn't want to go to the gym", Ben Daniels: is in the car on the way home" (this will be sent from his iPhone - Ben Daniels cannot even wait until he gets home to post something on Facebook), "Ben Daniels: is watching Eastenders", "Ben Daniels is tired and thinks he might go to bed". All of these are posts that I have actually seen on Facebook. If you haven't got anything interesting to say, don't say anything at all. The world doesn't want to know what you had for breakfast. But then again, there will always be those equally dull Facebookers that comment on those unnecessary statuses. "I love cornflakes!"

There are some who seem to think Facebook is just a big competition to see who can have the most ‘friends’. I have lost count of the number of times someone I have never heard of has requested to be my friend on the site. These are probably the people who don’t have any friends in real life. In fact, to them, Facebook probably is real life.

Possibly the most annoying Facebook types are those that send some sort of quiz to you every day. In that long ago time before Facebook, they would have been the ones responsible for those dull forwards with lame jokes landing in my inbox on a daily occurrence. Why do I want to know what alcoholic drink I’d be? The same goes for which cast members of various TV series’ I’d be, what age I’ll be when I have my first baby and which animal I’m most like. I also don’t want to know what score you have achieved on Facebook Scrabble, bingo, or any other of the games you can lose hours on.

Finally, I can’t forget the photo bores. If I have been on holiday, have attended a wedding or birthday party or have had a night out with a group of friends I haven’t seen in a while, I’ll create an album with a selection of photos. Photo bores take their cameras everywhere with them and will then post every single photo they have taken . Theirs will be the albums with 200 pictures, including the blurred ones and the ones that are similar to five other ones. Often these photo bores will also be serious attention-seekers – this is quite obvious from the fact that they are in every other photo, normally doing some sort of outrageous pose.

I may be a Facebookaholic but I can take comfort in the knowledge that it could be worse. I could be one of the above.